Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
