if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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