Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
