this just has baby written all over it
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
She has the best kind of daddy issues
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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