She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
