My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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