you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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