To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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