My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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