girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize