You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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