Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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