Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize