I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
