If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Randomize
