Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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