Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
