we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
