I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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