never play flip cup with pint glasses
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
