I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
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