do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
