dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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