I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
