turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
