Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
