My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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