There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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