i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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