So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
No more Irish car bombs ever.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Blood and glitter go together right?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
