people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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