Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
