theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
