dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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