I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
