This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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