Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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