I am in a vortex of obligation.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Randomize
