Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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