YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
