today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Randomize
