There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize