I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
