Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize