I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
oh god was she eating orange peels again
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
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