Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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