I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Randomize
