Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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