You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
