Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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