Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
